Powder Puff- "State Champs"

So, you know how sometimes, you hear the phrase, "You take things way too seriously?" Well, tonight, was definitely a prime example of taking things too seriously.

Tonight, we had practice for Powder Puff. And honestly, it was a riot. Our coaches are ridiculous, half the girls there think they're the best thing since string cheese, and it was dark, raining, and cold. But it was definitely something I'll never forget. Ever. I mean, after all, tonight WAS the night that I learned to shuffle, scrape, and fill.

And those, my friends, those are lifelong skills right there.

Powder Puff tonight told me tonight that High School really is all about fun. I may have noticed that a few other times, but tonight really hit me. Sure, I may never go to dances. And sure, maybe we won't win every big football game. But it's those Friday nights with friends, helping your best friends get ready, and five 16 year old boys making idiots out of themselves that make every pound of that Physics homework worth it.

After practice, our "coaches" decided that it would be a "good" idea to have a team cheer. So what do they pick to yell? "State Champs on 3!" Oh my. Leave it up to boys. Oh well.

And in case that's not good enough, here's some Vital Information For Your Everyday Life:

It's a good idea to eat bacon for breakfast. It's a bad idea to put bacon on your face and run around screaming, "HEY, LOOK AT ME! I'M PORK BOY THE BREAKFAST MONKEY!!"

You say potato. I say potahto. You say tomato. I say look at us, we're two idiots talking about vegetables.

If it's the last thing you do, guess what? You're dead!

It's a bad idea to walk up to a policeman and say, "Oh Mr. Policeman, take me to prison, please!"

If a dog asks you what your favorite color is, run like the wind, 'cause dogs ain't a spose to talk!"

When you step on a crack, you break your mother's back. When you step on a rusty nail, you say “AHHHHHH!”

It's easy to milk a cow. It's hard to milk a hippie named Maurice.

If your name is Stephen, and you have a turkey named Stefan, then come Thanksgiving you'll be Stephen Stuffin' Stefan!!

It's not nice to push your friend Billy off the roof and scream, “Look Neighbors!
It's Raining Billy!!”

A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush. A bird in your pants could make it very uncomfortable.

When it rains, it pours. When it snows, it's cold.

If your grandma gives you a new sweater, it's wrong to wrap it around her neck and squeeze until she turns blue.

If you can count to seventeen on one hand, then good luck finding gloves you seventeen-fingered freak!!

Revenge is sweet. Not as sweet as ten pounds of sugar!!!

Next time you're feeling sick, take a piece of ham and rub it all over your body. You won't feel any better, but you'll smell like ham!

If you’re having trouble with your homework, don't go up to your teacher and say, “This homework is too hard. Now give me a big wet kiss!”

If you're afraid of heights, don't climb a ladder. If you're afraid of marshmallows, don't climb a ladder made of marshmallows.

If your mama has a deep voice and hair all over her back, YOUR MAMA'S A DUDE!

If you don't know the difference between bologna and your underwear, then I'm never eating a sandwich at your house!

The early bird gets the worm. Fine, I don't want the worm!

If it's the fourth of July and Santa comes down your chimney, then run like the wind. That ain't Santa!

Always look both ways before crossing the street. NEVER, EVER TRY TO IRON THE WRINKLES OUT OF YOUR GRANDMA'S FACE!

Everybody likes the smell of Grandma's cooking. No one likes the smell of grandma's pajamas.

Never begin a letter to your grandfather "Dear old bald guy with wrinkles"

Monkey see, monkey do. Monkey don't see, monkey step in doo.

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall. Humpty Dumpty had a great fall... and I laughed my butt off! Ha HA!

When in Rome, do as the Romans do. When a truck backs over your foot, go "Aaaauuuuuuggggghhhhh!"

It's rude to talk with your mouth full. It's even ruder to talk with your mouth full of baby squirrels.

Eenie, Meenie, Miney, Moe. Catch a tiger by the toe. If it hollers, let it go, because if you don't, he's going to kill you!

If you have a fear of spiders, then you have arachnophobia. If you have a fear of breathing, then have about four minutes to live.

When someone asks you, "What do you want to be when you grow up?", it's rude to say, "I wanna be a big, fat loser. JUST LIKE YOU!"
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So maybe those were funny.. .or maybe that was just the longest post ever. Either way.